-with love, Cassie.

"I’ll move on baby, just like you… When the desert floods and the grass turns blue. When..."

Sat, 30 Apr 2011 22:12:47 -0400

“I’ll move on baby, just like you… When the desert floods and the grass turns blue. When a sailing ship don’t need her moon.. It’ll break my heart, but I’ll get through. Someday when I stop loving you.”

- Carrie Underwood

<\3;

Sun, 24 Apr 2011 23:48:21 -0400

You left. Did you even care to look behind you? Because I have no choice but to look in front of me, unfortunately. In front of me I see you struggling to make a living. I see chaos unfolding and your heart breaking. When I look into your heart, there is something missing. Like that piece has been lost for a couple of months now… I know where it is. Look behind you and see what you have left behind.

"Hope isn’t anything worth holding onto, you need that free hand to get a hold of reality."

Thu, 07 Apr 2011 22:29:33 -0400

“Hope isn’t anything worth holding onto, you need that free hand to get a hold of reality.”

My reality;

Thu, 07 Apr 2011 22:14:00 -0400

Truth is… I am dying inside, all hope is loss, and my faith is shaken. Honestly, doubting God isn’t what I would consider my major problem. Yes, I know the “Sunday school answer” that it should be. I know I am a hypocrite. I know just about all of me is negative at this moment in time. High school is the best years of my life? My butt. My life isn’t “what you make it” like Hannah Montana promises. I could choose to be happy and wildly optimistic… but why? I am not going to set myself up for failure and more pain. I can’t take much more of this crap. I think that caring is my problem. If I didn’t care, I wouldn’t be let down. I wouldn’t be upset that my parents abandoned me at 15. I wouldn’t occasionally cry myself to sleep because my baby brother will not remember the person who changed his diaper, wiped his tear, and rocked him to bed the night’s mom and dad “went” out. I wouldn’t care that God doesn’t… This is MY reality. The complications I face every day. On top of that, I try to be as close as perfect as far as what people can see. An honor roll student, star softball player, perfect big sister, unbreakable, a best friend, and happy. Ohhhhhhh boyyyy. Do I have them fooled…. It doesn’t come as easy as it they think.

To my best friend...

Thu, 10 Feb 2011 23:44:00 -0500

I do love you. Very very much. To the point where I am scared of losing you. Where I base my life on what you think. Where if you leave, I will wither away like dust. And that you are the only persons acceptance I need. I want you to be happy… But not with out me… I love you so much because you are my hero. You save my life each and every day. I love you so much because you love me. And you haven’t left me in the last four or five years and show no sign of leaving. My parents showed sign of uncertainty before I was even concieved. You have already beat them. I love you because you are the only person I trust and to talk too. You make me smile when i want to cry you make me smile when i am crying. You make me not afraid of depression because I know you will walk me through it. I love you because you love me for who I am. And I am not a great person. But you. Still. Love. Me. And I could never express my thanks to you. Not even in a lifetime. Not with money. Not with fulfilling wishes. But hoping that I can love you just as much as you love me. You are the most greatest friend that I could ever have dreamed about an I LOVE YOU. (not homosexually though. Icky.)

Photo

Fri, 14 Jan 2011 22:40:06 -0500

New home. New parents. New life;

Fri, 07 Jan 2011 21:03:00 -0500

No body will ever understand why I have the ~~trust~~ issues I do. Well, my parents, for example. Mine left me at 15. My sister at 13. And my baby brother at 18 months. So I build about fifteen years of trust and love for them, and then poof. They are gone. More important stuff I guess. So now I am supposed to believe that when people say “I am “always” there.” it is true? No. Always has its exceptions. So does love, I suppose.

My current state of living is the nicest people I could possibly ask for. My siblings and I are all seperated. My brother is hours away with a stranger. And me and my sis are a couple miles down the road. But her “family” plans on moving soon.

I am now one of the kids with “guardians” instead of parents. I am also left with a ~~broken heart~~, a fake smile, and a new life. Keeping my head up is tough, but I guess this could be a new start. However, trusting another human being will not be happening anytime soon in my life.

Mommy and daddy…. I still love you.. though you don’t feel the same…

"You’re… My Friend, my companion, through good times and bad my friend, my buddy, through..."

Sat, 27 Nov 2010 13:44:23 -0500

““You’re…
My Friend,
my companion,
through good times and bad
my friend, my buddy,
through happy and sad,
beside me you stand,
beside me you walk,
you’re there to listen,
you’re there to talk,
with happiness, with smiles,
with pain and tears,
I know you’ll be there,
throughout the years!””

- anon

(Lie)fe.

Fri, 26 Nov 2010 12:00:07 -0500

No body prefers a lie. So don’t base your life on them, or prepare to be lonely.

Photo

Fri, 26 Nov 2010 02:20:53 -0500

"‎”Never pretend to a love which you do not actually feel, for love is not ours to command."

Fri, 26 Nov 2010 01:57:38 -0500

“‎”Never pretend to a love which you do not actually feel, for love is not ours to command.””

- Alan Watts

"Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated."

Wed, 24 Nov 2010 23:52:00 -0500

““Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated.””

- Confucius

(un)Trustworthy;

Tue, 23 Nov 2010 19:02:00 -0500

How DO you trust exactly? And what is it? Is it telling your secrets and knowing they will never be repeated? Is it loving and being promised there is no heartbreak? Is it the security of being told that a loved one will never leave your side? Is it as delicate as an infant not having the fear of falling because they trust not to be dropped? What about just a simple command, such as don’t eat a certain fruit from a certain tree, and being trusted not to do it? As much as we fantasize for the perfect relationship or what not… No one is 100% trustworthy. I’m not. I’ll admit it, but it’s not that I’m not loyal. The fact we are untrustworthy as humans, I think, is the fact it is accepted to be trusted with certain things. The fact that we don’t trust is because of the untrustworthy people… And the fact that people don’t trust is because of us. Yeah, I “trust” some people, don’t we all? But aren’t we all untrustworthy to an extent also? I am.

"The world would be a comfortable place if we would admit the things we were ashamed of."

Mon, 22 Nov 2010 19:42:23 -0500

“The world would be a comfortable place if we would admit the things we were ashamed of.”